Friday, December 31, 2004

New Years Eve

Weight: 64.8 Exercise: No, No, No....still walking like an 80 year old! Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain toast with W/W Margerine and Lemon Curd Lunch: White Bread Roll with W/W Margerine, Apple Scroll, Grapes Afternoon Tea: Club Chocolate Bar, Pineapple Lollies Dinner: Steak, Cous Cous, Coleslaw, Egg, Beetroot, Green Salad, 6 Glasses Champagne Snack: Box of Cheddar Sticks, CC's Who's idea was it to do the step class? And who's idea was it to try and keep up with the instructor, knowing full well that we haven't done a step class in a VERY long time, so any muscles being used will not have been used for a long time either, which accounts to being sore the next day!! And who's idea was it to jump and do propulsions (sp) instead of taking it easy and just doing the basic moves? When will I learn??? Well that was my last pigout until my birthday (1st Feb), and I'm happy that I've made this decision. I so want to lose this 5kg that is just stubbonly refusing to move. My eating and drinking habits have not helped at all, so this is it......I have to be strong and I need to be positive and really WANT to do this. I know I can!!

Thursday 30th December

Weight: 64.8 Exercise: Can't even walk properly, never mind exercise!! Food Intake: Breakfast: Porridge with Golden Syrup Morning Tea: Mini Size Bag Salt & Vinegar Chips, Grapes Lunch: Chips Afternoon Tea: Plums Dinner: Bread Roll with Low Fat Cheese, Bread roll with W/W Margerine We went to the beach, and instead of making a salad (which I was going to do!!) we ended up buying chips from the local chippy and eating them on the beach (the flies loved it!!), and when we got home, I was so wrecked that I just found the quickest and easiest thing to eat.....bread!! I am now walking like an 80 year old!! I'm having alot of trouble standing up, as any weight on my calves makes me buckle over!! And they say the 2nd day is worse! Can't wait for tomorrow! The Tiger Balm has been really useful anyway!

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Wednesday 29th December

Weight: 64.8 Exercise: Step Combo Class Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Lunch: Tuna Mayo & Cucumber on Grain Bread Afternoon Tea: 1 Salada Biscuit with W/W Margerine & Very Low Fat Cheese, Flake, Mini Packet of Salt & Vinegar Chips Dinner: Chicken with Brown Rice & Soy Sauce, LITE Mars Bar I gave in to the call of the Chocolate. I've been craving a Flake Bar for ages, yet once I'd eaten it, I couldn't even remember what it tasted like!! I was going to buy some Hot Cross Buns instead, and I so wish I had now!! I'm sure I would have enjoyed them so much more! Doing the step class was great, but my legs have now firmly decided that they didn't like it much and I am having trouble walking at the moment!! I saw at the gym this morning that there is a Circuit class tomorrow night, so I'm going to make a determined effort to get to that class whether I can walk or not!!

Tuesday 28th December

Weight: 65.2 Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl of Porridge with Golden Syrup Lunch: Tuna Mayo & Cucumber Sandwich on Grain Bread, Low Fat Choc Mousse Afternoon Tea: Crust of Bread with W/W Margerine Dinner: Chicken & Pumpkin Risotto I was so cold today. I really wanted to go to the gym this evening but I just could not face taking my clothes off to put my gym clothes on....I was freezing. Had to turn the heating on, and I had a blanket covering me when I was sitting watching the TV.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Monday 27th December

Weight: 64.6 Exercise: 1 Hr Walk/Run (Outside) Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie, 2 Vanilla Wafer Biscuits Lunch: Bowl of Tomato Soup, 2 Slices Grain Toast with W/W Margerine, 2 Vanilla Wafer Biscuits Dinner: Cous Cous, Coleslaw, Beetroot, 1/2 Egg, Garden Salad, 1/2 Chicken Breast, 1/2 Steak So I think today was okay. Only the wafer biscuits were a No No, but the packet was open!! Probably needed to eat more fruit (and there's plenty in the fridge too!!). At least I got to do some exercise today (finally!!).

Monday, December 27, 2004

Boxing Day

Weight: 65.0 Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain Toast with W/W Margerine & Lemon Curd Lunch: 2 Satay Chicken Kebabs (cold), Cous Cous, Coleslaw, 1 Egg, Green Salad, Grapes Dinner: 2 Salada Biscuits with W/W Margerine & Extra Light Cheese, Watermelon Good day today. Felt like I actually ate pretty well. No junk food, no alcohol. Things are looking up!!!

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Christmas Day

Weight: 64.6 Exercise: Can't see it happening today!! Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl of Porridge with Golden Syrup, 1/2 Croissant Mums Place: 2 Shortbread biscuits, 3 Choc Mint Thin Biscuits Lunch: Chicken Breast, Cous Cous, Green Salad, Coleslaw 1/2 Egg, 3 Glasses Champagne Afternoon Tea: 1 W/W Choc Mousse, 3 Plums Dinner: 2 Satay Chicken Kebabs, Cous Cous, Coleslaw, 3 Glasses Champagne Well I think I got through that pretty well considering what was available to eat!! I only ate the sweet stuff at my Mums house because I was getting quite hungry and it was all laid out on the table, so very easy to get to. I'm really glad that we made the decision not to buy any more chocolates and cakes for Christmas Day. Don't get me wrong, I was really craving them, but there was plenty of food to eat so my stomach was constantly full!!! I'm going to see if I can leave off the alcohol until New Years Eve!! Wish me luck!!

Friday, December 24, 2004

Friday 24th December

Weight: 64.8 Exercise: House Cleaning Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain Toast with W/W Margerine Lunch: 2 Strawberry Wafers, Cherries Dinner: Pasta Bolognese, White Bread Roll with W/W Margerine Snack: 2 Strawberry Wafers I've started to get my appetite back!! I really wanted to continue with eating just fruit, but I really felt like I needed something a bit more substantial for dinner. At least I didn't open the champagne....will wait till tomorrow for that!!

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Thursday 23rd December

Weight: 64.0 Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: 2 Anzac Biscuits, 2 small Pieces Cake Lunch: Vietnamese Banquet, Fried Ice Cream, 6 Glasses Champagne Dinner: 1 Plum, 1 Large glass Baileys I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself. The food was absolutely delicious. I took quite a lot of tablets to make me feel better yesterday and my throat feels much better - I can actually swallow without grimacing!! Hate to think what my weight's going to be tomorrow!!

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Wednesday 22nd December

Weight: 64.6 Exercise: Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Lunch: Boost Iced Coffee Smoothie, Apple Scroll Afternoon Tea: Grapes Dinner: 4 Plums Still not much of an appetite. The Apple Scroll was so fresh that it just glided down my throat, I hardly had to chew it at all. Probably not a good way to lose weight, but it's happening anyway. Last day of work tomorrow and we've got the Xmas Lunch. Looks like plenty of rice for me. Not sure I can handle much more than that. Well that's how I feel tonight....once I'm sitting at that table with all the food coming out it may be a different story...we're having a banquet in a large chinese/vietnamese?? restaurant.

Tuesday 21st December

Weight: 65.2 Exercise: Tossing & Turning in Bed Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Lunch: Grapes, 2 Fun Size Bags of CC's Dinner: Few Slices of Roast Pork (done on BBQ) I have a very sore throat today. Am off work as I can hardly move, my body is very achy. This has put a big buffer on my appetite, and I am drinking copious amounts of water. Wonder how long it'll last and whether I can keep up the new style of eating!!

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Monday 20th December

Weight: 66.2 Exercise: 7 Min Cross Trainer (1.04km), 45 Min Spin Class Food Intake: Breakfast: Porridge with Golden Syrup Morning Tea: 2 Biscuits Lunch: Chicken & Pumpkin Risotto, Lite Mince Pie, Lemon Meringue Yoghurt Afternoon Tea: Grapes Dinner: Tuna Mayo & Cucumber Grain Sandwich, Fun Size Bag of CC's I seem to be doing the lunch and dinner thing in reverse. I really enjoy eating a hot lunch. Not sure where it's come from, probably when I was liivng in the UK. I worked for a very large company who had a very large restaurant. I mainly chose to eat hot lunches!! Not feeling very well tonight and I have a sore throat....oh no!!

Monday, December 20, 2004

Sunday 19th December

Weight: 65.6 Exercise: Mow Lawn, Weeding Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain Toast with W/W Margerine Lunch: Porterhouse Steak, 2 BBQ Kebabs, 400g Cherries, 2 Lite Mince Pies, 3 Glasses Champagne Dinner: 2 Salada with Philly Cheese & Light Cheese, 2/3 Box After Dinner Mints, 2 Glasses Champagne Well my little statement yesterday about not eating any more crap until Christmas just went straight out the window!! So there's now no more Christmassy stuff in the cupboards and I'm not going to buy any more. We're going to the beach on Xmas Day so it'll be cold chicken and chocolate, no cakes, no lollies!! There will, of course, be alcohol!!

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Saturday 18th December

Weight: 66.0 Exercise: 30 Mins Cross Trainer (5.66km), Lots of Situps, Few Weights Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Celebration Chocolates Lunch: Piece of Chicken, Steak, Kebab, Coleslaw, Potato Salad, Cheese Straws, Lollies, 5 Glasses Champagne Dinner: 2 Bread Rolls with W/W Margerine, Twisties, 1/2 Box Favourites, 2 Glasses Champagne So that went well.....not!!! No more pigging out now until the Works Xmas Lunch (Thursday 23rd).

Friday, December 17, 2004

Friday 17th December

Weight: 65.2 Exercise: No time today (well that's my excuse!!) Food Intake: Breakfast: Small bowl of Porridge with Golden Syrup Morning Tea: 8 Cadbury Roses Chocolates Lunch: Can of Chicken & Sweetcorn Soup, 2 Slices GrainBread with W/W Margerine, Low Fat Trifle Afternoon Tea: Apple, 3 Biscuits Dinner: Lean Cuisine Lasagne, White Bread Roll with W/W Margerine, Celebration Chocolates (way too many!!) Late Snack: Bread Roll with W/W Margerine, Celebration Chocolates (stuffed full of them now!). Well I've blown it now. I'm into Xmas mode, so that means my eating has gone out of the window. Chocolate, cakes, alcohol will now be consumed in large quantities, at will, for the next 10 days. This is then followed by a manic stretch of exercising and complaining about how much weight I've put on....happens every year, so I should be used to it by now!!

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Thursday 16th December

Weight: 66.6 Exercise: 30 Mins Cross Trainer (5.63km), 30 Mins Situps Food Intake: Breakfast: Small Bowl of Porridge with Golden Syrup, 1 Slice Grain Toast with W/W Margerine Morning Tea: 5 Plums, 4 Strawberries Lunch: Lettuce, Tomato, Cucumber, Coleslaw, Beetroot, Egg, Tuna Mayo, Low Fat Vanilla Yoghurt Afternoon Tea: 3 Biscuits Dinner:Pasta Bolognese, Low Fat Trifle Okay, I got through today without too much hassle. Didn't need the biscuits but I had a cup of coffee, and the biscuits went with it (don't just happens!!). I'm not going to be able to go to the gym tomorrow as I've had a little operation on my arm to get a contraceptive device fitted, and the doctor recommended that I don't do any exercise for 24 hours otherwise I'll increase the chances of the area bruising badly. So I now have to make the decision whether I can live with lots of bruising on my arm, and say "what the hell" and go to the gym anyway, or take the advice of the doctor and have a lay in, then maybe think about going tomorrow night instead (which probably isn't going to happen...hate going to the gym in the evening!!). Decisions, decisions!!

Wednesday 15th December

Weight: 66.6 Exercise: Weight Workout, Situps Food Intake: Breakfast: Nutri Grain with Skinny Milk Morning Tea: 97% Fat Free Banana Slice Lunch: Tuna & Mayo Sandwich, Low Fat Choc Mousse Afternoon Tea: Strawberries, Plums Dinner: Chicken Korma & Brown Rice, 3 Glasses Champagne Late Snack: 1 BOX (Yep a whole box) Lindt Mint Balls . 12 BALLS What hope is there for me???? Went shopping for some prezzies and also came home with the box of mint balls, a big box of Favourites and Celebrations. They were all for Xmas, and I was going to put them all to the back of the cupboard so that we couldn't see them (out of sight, out of mind). BUT then I sat down to watch a DVV and I couldn't stop thinking about the Mint Balls, so I just got up and ate the whole lot!! The Favourites and the Celebrations I can take or leave and I know that I won't bother opening these. BUT if Nick opens them then I'm in big trouble!! I've recently realised that I ALWAYS put on weight over Christmas. I've almost allowed myself to do this as I don't want to miss out on all the food and drink that's going around. I can't remember the last time that I haven't indulged in all the yummy food and drink at Christmas.....oh yes - when I was 8 1/2 months pregnant. Mind you I still ate like a pig, just couldn't drink to excess!!

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Tuesday 14th December

Weight: 66.4 Exercise: 30 Mins Cross Trainer (5.28km) 30 Mins Situps Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: 97% Fat Free Apricot Slice, 1 Freddo Frog Lunch: Chicken & Pumpkin Risotto, Low Fat Choc Mousse Afternoon Tea: Grapes, 3 Biscuits Dinner: Lettuce, Cucumber, Cous Cous, Coleslaw, Beetroot, Egg, Tomato, Piece of Christmas Cake So glad that all the "free" chocolate has been eaten at work now. I just have to try and keep away from the biscuit tin!! I've decided that I'm goin go do work on my stomach every day. I know that I can't get rid of the fat that's sitting over my stomach by doing spot training, but I'm going to make sure that when all the fat does fall off, there's a lovely washboard stomach underneath. It doesn't take anything to sit in front of the TV doing sit-ups, and we have one of those ab-cruncher machines as well. We've also got a fit-ball, so there's just no excuse to do the exercise in the evening.....well I can easily find an excuse, but there's not one really!!

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Monday 13th December

Weight: 66.4 Exercise: 10 Mins Cross Trainer (1.28km), 45 Min Spin Class Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: Chocolates (too many to count), Grapes Lunch: Lean Sausage, Coleslaw, Beetroot, Cous Cous, Lettuce, Tomato, Cucumber Afternoon Tea: Cherries Dinner: Toasted Low Fat Cheese Sandwich with Tomato Sauce I'm really getting down about my weight. Sometimes I wake up and I just mope about - this morning was a prime example and it takes a while to realise why I'm feeling crap. It always comes back to the same weight. Wish there was a little happy pill I could take when these feelings take over. Nick can always see when I'm like this and he knows the reason why too. I've complained about it often enough to him....yet I still make no effort to keep the crap food out of my mouth, which is the whole reason that I've put on weight in the first place......what a vicious cirle we live in!

Monday, December 13, 2004

Sunday 12th December

Weight: 65.8 Exercise: Digging in the garden Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices grain toast with w/w margerine & Lemon Curd Lunch: 2 Salada biscuits with w/w margerine & Low Fat Cheese Dinner: 2 BBQ Chicken Kebabs, 1 Lean Sausage, Beetroot, Coleslaw, Cous Cous, Low Fat Choc Mousse It felt like I ate alot today, but looking back at what I ate, I actually didn't put too much into my mouth!! I have blisters on my hands from digging!! God that's hard work.

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Saturday 11th December

Weight: 65.6 Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain Toast with W/W Margerine & Lemon Curd Lunch/Dinner: Chicken in Sun Dried Tomato Sauce, Cucumber, Cous Cous, Coleslaw, Tomato, 4 Glasses Champagne Late Snack: 2 Salada biscuits with w/w margerine & slice of Low Fat Cheese (why????) I didn't have time for lunch today, just too busy. So by dinner time I was really hungry. Luckily I had cooked the chicken up last night but hadn't eaten it, so put it with my salad tonight. I never used to eat Cous Cous, but I've found a really nice organic one which is pesto flavoured. It's lovely hot or cold, and goes really well with salad. Really gives it a nice flavour. It's strange how our taste buds change over the years. I never used to like the taste or smell of parmesan cheese, but of course this was just the dried stuff. Once I had tasted the fresh parmesan cheese, that was it for me, I was a convert. It doesn't smell like puke at all (the other stuff does!!) and it just melts on the food (if you're eating something hot), or just adds a bit of flavour if you're eating something cold. I never used to eat Cous Cous. No idea why, it just never appealed to me. Then one night we went to a friends place for a BBQ and because there wasn't much stuff there that I liked, it was either eat the Cous Cous or go hungry. I've liked Cous Cous ever since. When I was low carbing I found that I started to enjoy cream. I have never really gone for cream, always preferred Ice Cream. But when it was cream or nothing, I chose cream. I had it on and in everything. Anyone else had this happen to them?

Friday 10th December

Weight: 65.6 Exercise: Food Intake: Breakfast: 1 Slice Grain Toast with W/W Margerine Morning Tea: Big bunch Grapes, 2 choc chip biscuits Lunch: Pasta Bolognese, Low Fat Trifle Afternoon Tea: Apple, Low Fat Vanilla Yoghurt, Chocolates (about 8) Dinner: Large Bag of Cheese Pretzels, 3 Glasses Champagne One of our major customers at work is Cadburys (groan!!). Luckily the engineers who work there don't bring back chocolate very often (phew!!). Today my boss brought back a HUGE bag of chocolates (NNOOOOO!!). And my favourites, Cherry Ripes, were tucked in amongst that bag. How could I say no, how could I was just too much for me. And also the Chocolate Eclairs, a Freddo Frog and a Caramello Koala. I am BAD, BAD, BAD!!!

Friday, December 10, 2004

Thursday 9th December

Weight: 66.6 Exercise: 20 Mins Cross Trainer (3.47km) 10 Mins Treadmill - Power Walk on Incline (1.14km), 30 Mins Stomach Exercises Food Intake: Breakfast: 1 Slice Grain Toast with W/W Margerine, VERY small bowl Porridge with Golden Syrup. Morning Tea: Big bunch Grapes Lunch: Tortellini with Chicken & Carbonara Sauce, Low Fat Apple Pie Yoghurt Afternoon Tea: Cherries, Low Fat Choc Mousse Dinner: Pasta Bolognese with Parmesan Cheese Yes...I've done it....I've asked the man to remove the lolly box that sits right in front of me in reception. He was none too pleased either, but I explained to him that I'd asked everyone in the office if they minded that it was removed, and nobody objected. Just need to get rid of the little box of mini chocolates and the biscuit tin and then I'll be alot happier!! My knee is still playing up so I'm not going to run on it for a few days and then see how it feels. Looks like I may be looking into doing some classes instead. I saw that they've just started up a spinning class on Monday mornings at 6.15am, so I might just have to join in on that one. The one class that they don't have at the gym I go to is a circuit training class. I used to love doing them in the UK as they just worked the body so hard, especially if it was a male instructor taking the class. Can't beat the old pushups, situps, burpees, squats, lunges, sprints, jacks. get the picture!!

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Wednesday 8th December

Weight: 66.4 Exercise: 1 Hour Treadmill - 42 Mins Run, 18 Mins Power Walk (9.29km) Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: 2 Cream Biscuits, 1 Chupa Chup Lunch: Pumpkin & Chicken Risotto, Low Fat Choc Mousse Afternoon Tea: Punnet Strawberries, 2 Cream Biscuits Dinner: Fettucini with Chicken & Carbonara Sauce, Herb Foccacia, Nougat Bar I've hurt my knee. Got into work this morning and I'm finding it really hard to walk up and down the stairs....hurts like hell!!

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Tuesday 7th December

Weight: 66.6 Exercise: Weight Workout, Situps Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl of Allbran & Skinny Milk Morning Tea: 2 Salada Biscuits with Ham & Low Fat Cheese Lunch: Toasted Ham & Low Fat Cheese Sandwich, Low Fat Choc Mousse, 4 Chocolates Afternoon Tea: 3 Nectarines, 1 Shortbread Cream Biscuit Dinner: Chicken & Pumpkin Risotto, 2 Glasses Champagne An unwanted box of chocolates appeared on the table at lunch time, and they smelled so nice that I couldn't help myself. I think that I'm just going to have to accept the fact that I'm probably not going to lose any more weight and I have to be content with what I weigh now. My food and alcohol intake will always stand in the way of me losing any more weight, and unless I can change the way I feel about food and alcohol, nothing is going to change for me.

Monday 6th December

Weight: 65.8 Exercise: 30 Mins Cross Trainer (5.07km), 30 Mins Bike (10.5km) Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: Bag Choc Bullets Lunch: Tuna Mayo & Cucumber on Grain Sandwich, Cherries Dinner: 2 Lean Sausages, Small piece of Lamb Cutlet, Coleslaw, Cous Cous, Beetroot, 2 Glasses Champgane I had to go to the Reject Shop today and the bag of chocolate bullets just jumped out at me. They were the strawberry ones too (which I absolutely adore). The question to myself is, why couldn't I have just bought plain raspberry/strawberry licorice? Why did it have to be the choc coated ones? Was it because the bag was very cheap ($2) or did I really just want the chocolate instead? I felt so fat and bloated after I'd eaten them all....yep that's right, I ate the whole bag of them. Might have to work out calorie/fat intake for today, but will it make me sit up and take notice of what's going into my mouth???? - Probably not!!

Monday, December 06, 2004

Sunday 5th December

Weight: 65.8 Exercise: 1 Hr Squash, Mow Lawn Food Intake: Breakfast: 2 Slices Grain Toast with Lemon Curd Lunch: Tuna Mayo & Cucumber on Grain Bread, Pineapple pieces Dinner: T Bone Steak, Coleslaw, Cous Cous, Beetroot, Egg, 1/2 White Roll Too much bread today, but no lollies, chocolate, cake or alcohol - question is, am I substituting one for the other??? Think I might start using the BBQ every night that it's not the fact that I hardly have to wash any dishes!!

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Saturday 4th December

Weight: 66.0 Exercise: Walking around Shopping Centre for half a day (I hate Xmas shopping!!) Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl of Nutrigrain & Skinny Milk Lunch: Ham & Low Fat Cheese on White Roll, few grapes, 1/2 glass cider Dinner: Hamburger in White Roll, 3 BBQ Chicken Kebabs, Beetroot, Coleslaw, Cous Cous, Boiled Egg, 2 Glasses Champagne, 1/2 Glass Cider BBQ's are just so easy to cook. I love them. It also stops me from eating too much crap food as it's mainly meat and salad. And the smell of BBQ's is just fantastic!!

Friday 3rd December

Weight: ? Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: Apple Scroll Morning Tea: Cherries, 1 Choc Chip Cookie Lunch: Lean Cuisine Lasagne, Wholemeal Roll, Low Fat Choc Mousse Afternoon Tea: Pear Dinner: Chicken in Sundried Tomato Pesto, Cous Cous, 4 Double Choc Cookies, 2 Glasses Cider Once again I was doing okay until I went to the supermarket after work!! That's where I got the cookies and the cider from!! Need vegetables.....soon!!

Friday, December 03, 2004

Thursday 2nd December

Weight: 66.0 Exercise: 60 Mins Treadmill - 40 Mins Run, 20 Mins Power Walk (9.07km) Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl of Porridge with Golden Syrup Morning Tea: Apple Lunch: Pasta Bolognese, Lite Choc Cheesecake Afternoon Tea: 3 Biscuits, 1 Watermelon Chupa Chup Dinner: Jacket Potato with Coleslaw, Cheese, Pineapple, Lite Sour Cream, Bacon, 3 Glasses Champagne, 1 Glass JD & Diet Coke I went up to the casino tonight to meet a friend. They have a fabulous food court there and I was so tempted to get the chinese. But I saw the Jacket Potatoes and they were huge. Very filling and really nice too. See, I do have willpower sometimes!!

Thursday, December 02, 2004

Rambling On....

Up until the time I gave birth to my daughter, I never had a weight problem. I always thought I had one, but looking back at photos now, I was definitely not overweight. My weight has always sat at around the 9 � stone mark. I remember in 1992 I had been living on the Gold Coast for 3 or 4 years and we moved to Canberra, right in the middle of winter. Now winter on the Gold Coast means wearing a pair of trakky daks in the evening and chucking on a windcheater. And living on the Gold Coast, the body is on show alot of the time....I am a sun worshipper and was always at the beach!! (bad I know!) Winter in Canberra, for anyone who hasn't been there, is bloody freezing. Snow?and I mean lots of snow. Basically in the 4 months that I was there I packed on the weight. Didn't do any exercise, ate lots of comfort food, especially the Italian bread rolls that I found. They were scrummy and I could easily eat 4 - 6 in an evening, and that was on top of my dinner!! Anyway we moved back to Melbourne and I realised (very quickly) that I needed to lose weight. The thing is that it was easy to lose it. Joined the local gym, ate much better and whammo - the weight fell off!! Since having my daughter I have found it so hard to get back to my 9 � stone. I know that this is a comfortable weight for me and that I can get back to it. While I was living in the UK I came back to Oz 3 times for a holiday. The first time I still remember trying to lose weight before I came home (even though I probably didn't need to). In fact, I lost nearly a stone in weight while I was in Oz as I hardly ate anything, was running round like a headless chook most of the time, and remember drinking more than eating!! The next time I came home to Oz was in 2002. I managed to get down to just over 9 stone. And I still have my menus from then. I have tried to eat as I did then, but I just don't seem to have the willpower as I did then. I think my willpower back then may have had something to do with the fact that I thought that I'd meet up with my ex husband, and I wanted to look my best, not because I wanted to get back with him, but to show him that I was still looking good (vanity!!). Then I came back to Oz in 2003 and once again I managed to lose lots of weight so that I was about 9 � stone when I flew home. I think the problem may be that I'm not THAT uncomfortable with my weight. I can still fit into most of my clothes (maybe not as comfortably as I would like) and most people don't see me as being overweight (as long as they don't see me in my bathers). My BMI is normal - it's at the top end of normal, but it's still normal!! I can get into some size 10 jeans, either a size 12 or 14 top (I have bigger boobs!!) yet I still have a problem finding clothes that I feel comfortable in. I find it very hard to find dresses that fit due to my boobs not being in proportion to the rest of me. The size 10 dress fits until I try to do it up over the boobs. The size 12 or 14 does up fine at the top, but I then have no shape whatsoever on the bottom as I'm swimming in it!! I only want to get down to 60kg (133lb). That's only 6kg (13lb) to lose. Why is it so difficult now? Why doesn't my body want to let it go? I really work hard at the gym. I exercise most days. My biggest downfall must definitely be my food intake. I really have to admire the people who have lots of weight to lose and who stick to their weight loss plans AND lose all the weight. My biggest question for these people (I've never been confident enough to ask a large person) is how they got to that weight in the first place? I know in myself when I get to the point where my clothes are really uncomfortable to wear and I look in the mirror and don't like what I see, I have to do something about it. (I can also be really scabby with my money and I refuse to buy the next size up in clothing!!) What makes people continue to eat and eat? Sorry this is such a long post - just needed to ramble for a bit!!

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Wednesday 1st December

Weight: 67.0 Exercise: 30 Mins Treadmill - Power Walk (3.42km), 15 Mins Cross Trainer (2.41km) Food Intake: Breakfast: Bowl Porridge with Golden Syrup Morning Tea: Low Fat Banana Muesli Bar, 1/2 Nice Biscuit Lunch: Salad with Cous Cous, Low Fat Lemon Meringue Yoghurt Afternoon Tea: 1/2 Punnet Strawberries, Choc Peppermint Slice Dinner: Pasta Bolognese with Parmesan Cheese I shouldn't have gone into the hot bread shop....I should have got the bread rolls at Safeway!! I was doing so well too.....I'm just so weak, just can't stop myself from buying the bad things that do nothing to help my weight loss. To be honest the choc peppermint slice didn't even taste that nice, it was way too rich, and all it did was bring me out in a cold sweat. Some types of chocolate do that to me.

Tuesday 30th November

Weight: 67.0 Exercise: NO Food Intake: Breakfast: Banana Smoothie Morning Tea: Cherries, Apple Lunch: Salad with Cous Cous, Low Fat Trifle Afternoon Tea: 1/2 Punnet Strawberries Dinner: Chicken Chow Mein mixed with Cous Cous, 1 Glass Cider, 1 Slice Grain Bread with Low Fat Cheese I just couldn't resist the bread at the end of my dinner. I was full, my brain told me I was full, yet becuase I didn't feel "over" full, my stomach wanted more!! So I had the bread and cheese just to take me to that over full feeling.....why do I always do what my stomach dictates rather than my head????